SEPARATE LIVES (LIVING UNDER THE SAME ROOF)

There is a marriage certificate with both of your names on it.  You still share a bed (or maybe that is debatable).  You have kids together.  You certainly have the same roof over your head.  

And yet, you feel like separate lives.

When you feel isolated, lonely or disappointed it impacts how you show up as a wife. 

You think you are feeling those things  because of something your husband is doing or not doing. However, you are actually feeling those things because of what you are thinking about his actions.  Your thoughts create the feelings that lead to inaction on your part.

When we quit turning toward our partner, stop asking how their day was, cease to feel curious about their inner world, and continue to build evidence that they are unlovable, we will experience our relationship as two separate lives living under the same roof.

The good news is, nobody can tell you what to think.  You get to think whatever you want about your husband.  The thoughts you currently have  are just your thoughts—they are not facts. 

When you open yourself up to the idea that you can choose different thoughts about your husband, only then can you begin to create new feelings about your relationship.  And when you create new feelings about your relationship, then you can change how you show up.

When you show up 100%,  you change your experience from “we are two separate lives living under the same roof” to an experience of “I am connected to my man.”